Why I Don't Use an IPod While Running

I never run with music. I just don't. I couldn't quite put words to why but this morning during a group run my friend Matt and I discussed it.

Have you ever loved something so much that you just had to take it all in? Standing at the ocean or hiking through the woods or waking up to a cool spring morning. Think about one of those places. What does it smell like? What does it look like? What do you feel with your hands and feet? Can you taste anything? Salt in the air or morning coffee? Also, what do you hear?

When you think of these special places and moments, in many cases all 5 senses are engaged. That is how I feel about running. Oh, don't get me wrong, not every run is some "religious experience" or euphoric. Sometimes it's a terrible run. But it is a meaningful experience to me. I want to be present in that moment.

A lot of times we use music to take our minds off of the task; in this case it is running. It is a chore and burdensome and music is an escape from it. It makes time go faster. It entertains us because we feel bored. We use it so it feels a little less painful. I understand that, but that isn't how I view running.

Running is my opportunity to turn it all off. I don't have to think about what I need to be doing because I am doing it. My schedule for the day. My worries and cares. I can check it all at the door. I originally didn't listen to music because I didn't want to get hit by a car or not hear the dog chasing me down. Now I love the feel of the road on my feet. The taste of sweat on my lips. The view of a beautiful Bangkok morning. The smell of the park and/or the tobacco factory (lol). And the sounds of the morning. I am present in that moment. I have been asked if I pray while I run. Nope. Just turn it all off. But it is a spiritual experience. It is a way for me to commune with God and His creation and be still...so to speak.

You probably think I take running to seriously. Maybe. But you should hear how seriously I take my music too. That's for another day. If you run with music, tell me why. What kind of music motivates you? Why is it important to you?

Unsolicited Advice & Monday Morning Weigh In

I had to run to Cambodia on Saturday with the family. It is a long boring trip filled with bad snacks and worse movies, but hey, we made it and it's done. Along the way I was sitting in front of a guy who felt he was very smart...and loud. We stopped at a 7-11 and I was buying a Coke Zero when out of no where he says to me, "You know that's not really healthy right?"... Ok.

I think you all know where I am going with this. Nobody wants unsolicited advice. Whether it is health, life, faith, finance, whatever. If you didn't ask, you probably don't need or want my input. Look I know I probably shouldn't be drinking Coke Zero. I will probably go blind or glow in the dark or something. I know it. You don't have to tell me...YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME. You know what it made me want to do? Go buy a 2 liter of it and drink the whole thing in his presence. But you know what, that is my character flaw. That isn't at all how I should react. All I did was shrug my shoulders and say, "I'm thirsty." And then walk away.

I think there are 2 important lessons here.

1. Nobody wants advice not asked for or at least advice from someone they haven't given permission to give it. I take advice from good friends and spiritual mentors. I am part of a running club and love getting advice from them. We have camaraderie and are all trying to improve. It's all good, but if some dude I don't know stops me going around the park and offers me his "best running tip" or I run into a "fat" evangelist (skinny person giving fat person they don't know unsolicited advice)...yeah I ain't listening. So I know people give unsolicited advice for a variety of reasons but my best advice is just...don't.
2. Be gracious. I could've been more gracious to the guy offering the advice instead of just sort of blowing him off. Usually, people mean well. Be gracious because you know we are all guilty of this at some point in our lives. They are loved by God and are flawed like I am. Cut them some slack. Smile, say thank you and go on.

Monday Morning Weigh In:

Starting Weight: 119kg (261.8 lbs)

Last Week: 110.5kg (243.1 lbs) I gained 1.5lbs last week.

This Week: 109.2kg (240.2 lbs) -2.9 lbs Thank you very much! Pleased? Yes. Excited!

Spirit of the Marathon

I am less than a week away from starting marathon training. I feel ready. I feel good. I have had a lot of support from my family and my running group here in Bangkok. I am very pumped to start training. It reminded me of an awesome documentary. It is about I think 5 people. 4 average joe's and 1 elite athlete. It takes you through their ups and downs, successes and heart breaks. They are all training for the Chicago Marathon. Be inspired by their stories. It is a powerful film. Bring on Monday. I look forward to Day 1.

Sorry to throw a whole movie at you but I think you will like it. Moving.

Dealing w/ Disappointment & Monday Morning Weigh In

Have you ever been disappointed but when you thought about it you say to you yourself, "yeah, i guess that makes sense". That was my day today. I went out and did my Monday morning run. Afterwards I was bummed because my favorite Joke (Thai rice porridge) guy was out already. Then, as tradition has it, I go stand on the scale in the condo complex laundry room... and there it was. Let's do my weigh in now.

Starting weight: 119kg (261.8 lbs)

Last Week: 109.8 (241.6lbs)

This Week: 110.5 (243.1 lbs)

Seriously?! I gained 1.5 pounds? That sucks. But thinking about it, I had it coming. lol. I ate terrible this week. I got waaaay too comfortable with the weight I was losing. This weekend I was at a retreat center and we ate western food and meat and dessert after every meal...every meal. I had a choice to eat it or not. It is my fault, but I just thought, eh, what could it hurt? Now I know.

I'm not bumming huge, which is a victory in and of itself. Normally I would have thrown in the towel and said forget it. It has refocused me and put me back on task. I think that is what our shortcomings should do. Help us to focus, see where we made mistakes, make corrections and keep going.

So what are your shortcomings or disappointments? Do they cause you to focus, correct and move on or throw in the towel? I am now more focused than ever. Sure, I won't lie, it sucks. But it was a lesson I needed to learn. Learn with me. There is a lot to say about this but I am just giving you/me something to think about.

Disappointments will come our way and we will let ourselves down at times, but that is life. I am excited about the future. This isn't about looking good in skinny jeans, although I am sure I do. lol. This is about saving my life, not just from heart disease and obesity, but saving myself from a passionless life. For myself, my passion to follow and be like Jesus calls me to health and living a full life. I won't let a little disappointment keep me from that.

Before & Still Journeying Photos

Before I started working out about 7 weeks ago:

As of now:

I don't know why I wasn't smiling. lol. Concentrating too hard on taking the stupid picture

I'm starting to see the difference. Almost fit in an XL shirt today. Could've worn it but it would have felt awkward.

Isaiah 40

Isaiah 40:28-31

⁸

²⁸ Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
²⁹ He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
³⁰ Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
³¹ but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

Counting Victories and Monday Morning Weigh In

Sorry it has been a while since I wrote anything. I have been frustrated with some computer problems and I am hoping they are resolved now. So anyhow...

I ran 12.5 miles yesterday. Hey now, that is something. It is fun to see progress. You don't always get to see that. There are plenty of times it all feels flat and there is no progress being made at all. Ever feel like that? For example, I ram 12 miles yesterday and I ran my fastest 5k I ever ran since moving here this morning. Now I would say that's progress.

But just a few hours ago I was climbing the stairs of the BTS (Skytrain) and I thought I was going to pass out. lol. My heart was beating out of my chest and I was exhausted. It kinda ticked me off. I felt like I put all this work in and have seen so much progress but walking the stairs still kills me. But how am I going to spend my time reflecting? Not on the stupid stairs for sure.

I am going to look at the progress I have made and celebrate. I am going to count my victories. If I spent my life looking at everything I haven't done or haven't accomplished yet then I miss all the good stuff and victories I have had along the way. What a sad way to live.

Don't spend your time wallowing in what isn't happening throwing yourself a pity party (like I do at times). Look at your victories, no matter how small they seem to you, because they all add up. One victory at a time. One stair at a time. Peace.

Monday Morning Weigh In

Starting Weight: 119 kg (261.8 lbs)

Last Week: 111.7kg (245.7lbs)

Today: 109.8kg (241.6lbs)

20 lbs!!

Saturday is for Jon Foreman

Connecting Neighbors & Health

I am not guaranteeing an awesome post every day. 5 days a week. You probably already figured out my posts aren't awesome already. lol. So I had a morning off and what did I do? I walked 12 miles. That's not to brag. It's just an opportunity I took to get to know my neighborhood and a few others a little better. I decided to walk all the streets around me I hadn't walked before.

It was a good time. I got to meet some interesting people and I got in some good exercise. You know in the States I kind of knew one of my neighbors. He was a nice elderly gentleman I shared a fence with. But you know it was months before I even realized he died. We were pretty disconnected from them. Here I know more neighbors than I ever have before. It is great. And I communicate less because my Thai isn't that hot.

Make that a workout one day. Take a few hours and walk streets in your town you never walked before. Stop and talk to neighbors. Take 4 hours and let it rip. What a great way to energize your body and your soul. Connecting your life together in one workout. The family can walk with you as long as they are able. Who knows, you might even enjoy it. Have a great day.

Monday Morning Weigh In - Nothing to Fear

I just have a little bit to say today. I mainly want to say that I'm no longer afraid of the scale. Not because I have arrived or am the peak of physical fitness, but because I know I am doing everything I know I can do.

Hard work pays off. My nutrition is at about 85% of where I want it to be. That's pretty good. Trying to get to about 95% this week and see how that feels. My biggest hang up is pop (soda). I am trying to make it until after my long run on Sunday. The twitches are starting to kick in already. Anyways...

The scale is not our enemy. I am not losing weight for the sake of losing weight. I need to eat better and exercise for a longer, better quality of life for my family and myself. If it was just about losing weight to look good in skinny jeans then forget it. The scale is just one indicator that I am moving towards a healthier life. We are partners. It holds me accountable. I got a marathon to run in November and I have an Ironman 70.3 in December of 2013 if all goes well. The scale is just one sign post along the path. I love it. With that said, here is Monday morning weigh in:

Starting Weight on June 18th - 119kg (261.8lbs)
Last week 114kg (250.8kg)
Today 111.7kg (245.7lbs)

Total Loss: 7.3kg (16.1lbs)

Weekend is for Beastie Boys. Don't Hate.

Falling Off the Wagon

Just a short post here. I fell off the wagon yesterday at lunch time. I devoured and incredibly meat based lunch. I even figured I should just forget and ate a McD's ice cream cone after as well. But there is some good news in all of that.

Every other time this has happened in my life I would just throw in the towel and forget it. But I didn't this time! I went right back to eating vegetarian and eating right. Sure I was upset with myself but in a sense it the loss was a victory. Let me explain.

I was able to analyze what happened and why. Two major factors. First no no, I didn't eat breakfast. They say to live healthy you have to eat breakfast. I skipped it. The 2nd no no (kind of) is that my morning routine was thrown off. Normally I go to Bangkok University and study in the coffee shop and eat lunch in their cantina. But yesterday I had to run an errand and in this town running one errand can take all morning. So that is a victory as well. Next time my schedule is thrown off I just need to lock it in and focus and remember to do the right things. I also need to remember to eat breakfast.

So don't give up when you stumble. Figure out what happened and make the correction. Don't beat yourself up. There is strength in our weakness. Push on.

Pulling Punches and Crossing Over to Crazy

So I am convinced. I am convinced more than ever that there comes a time when you just have to make a decision. We treat our lives as normal. We think, "Well I'm here. That's nice". We were meant for so much more than eeking out an existence. But for so many of us (including me) we just do enough to get by and have lost our hearts. Our passion. Ourselves.

Life is amazing! Isn't it? I mean here I am. I exist and it is awesome. What an amazing privilege. Don't get me wrong. Crap happens and tragedy strikes us all at some point, but that is something to hold on to as well. We are alive and experience it all. What a gift to get to experience life, love, hope, tragedy, but for so many of us we are paralyzed or numbed by it all and we pull up short in grabbing life and living it fully. I know I do.

I know I up and moved my whole family to Thailand. Some would say that is grabbing life and living but to be honest I still pull punches at times. I don't say what's really on my mind. I don't choose the adventure or the unknown. Even our move to Thailand was well researched and planned out as much as possible. I sit back at times and look at life and say, "I can never do that." Or I say, "Good for them, they took a risk and it worked (or it didn't)." But I don't make those choices. I play it as safe as possible. I push my limits to a point and say "that's far enough." But I have stifled the fire in my belly. We have been conditioned to stifle it. What about you? Not to be reckless...well maybe reckless. We worship "safety" and "predictability" and in the process we lose a piece of our soul.

I want my soul back.

I want to embrace this life I was given and live it. I have met amazing people in my life. They chose to live their lives by their rules and live it passionately. They don't seem to follow the dictates of their culture. I want to love people unconditionally. I want to believe I can do more than I ever thought I can do. I want to be the person God made me to be and not shy away from it. I have been pushed by those around to share my thoughts more. I tend to pull punches and say just enough. I tend to make different choices, but I don't cross the line to where people will think I'm crazy. But then isn't it more crazy to live life full of "what if's"? Surely there are worse things than failing. Like never trying.

I love my life. I love my family. I love everything about it. But I still think I am not living my life the way I was made to live it. I suffer for it. My family suffers for it. Because it steals my joy, my hope and love. So I have decided to embrace 3 things unashamedly.

1. Jesus. I want to be more like him. Honestly, who wouldn't?
2. Unconditional love for all people with no "but's" or (insert cliche' line here that makes us feel better).
3. That I have been given the "want to" to do some crazy things. Things I don't think I am physically able to or mentally tough enough to. And maybe I'm not, but I sure want to find out.

Ok. Enough talking about it. Good day.

And here I thought I was going to talk about the virtual partner option on my Garmin... maybe tomorrow.

Looking For a Recommendation

I just thought I would throw out some books I have been reading and see if you guys want to throw any back at me. I got 4 so far. Three I have read already and 1 I am working on.

Read:

The Runner's Guide to the Meaning of Life by Amby Burfoot - "As runners, we all go through many transitions-- transitions that closely mimic the larger changes we experience in a lifetime. First, we try to run faster. Then we try to run harder. Then we learn to accept ourselves and our limitations, and at last, we can appreciate the true joy and meaning of running."

Look, my best marathon was 5:26:36. This book was for me as well as the 2:30:00 marathoner or anyone who has included running as an important part of their life. Funny. Smart. Inspiring stories from his life and the lives of others.He provides alot of resources outside of his own book. Very motivating and fun read.

Finding Ultra by Rich Roll - "...Finding Ultra is much more than an edge-of-the-seat look at a series of jaw-dropping athletic feats—and much more than a practical training manual for those who would attempt a similar transformation. Yes, Rich’s account rivets—and, yes, it instructs,providing information that will be invaluable to anyone who wants to change their physique. But this book is most notable as a powerful testament to human resiliency, for as we learn early on, Rich’s childhood posed numerous physical and social challenges, and his early adulthood featured a fierce battle with alcoholism."

It was a great challenge and life lesson. It was a good kick in the pants and a reminder that every aspect of our lives are connected. Family, work, wholeness, brokenness, health and spirituality. I'll man up and admit that I got teary-eyed a few times. Not out of sentimentality, but within hisstory I saw my own as well.

Can't Swim, Can't Bike, Can't Run by Andy Holgate - "This book is both a lesson in true grit and determination, but its goal is one that is attainable. Andy isn't a sporting superstar, he holds down a 9-5 job and all the pressures that go with it; he isn't blessed with speed and talent; there are no multi-million pound sponsorship deals; yet this remarkable "common man" is inspiring in a way that some of today's sporting superstars have forgotten how to be."

I reviewed this book before and I wrote, "It is a story of regualr guy who decides to see what he is made of and ends up becoming an Ironman. Check out the story of this librarian and see what connects with you"

Currently Reading:

Born to Run by Christopher McDougall - "Isolated by Mexico's deadly Copper Canyons, the blissful Tarahumara Indians have honed the ability to run hundreds of miles without rest or injury. In a riveting narrative, award-winning journalist and often-injured runner Christopher McDougall sets out to discover their secrets. In the process, he takes his readers from science labs at Harvard to the sun-baked valleys and freezing peaks across North America, where ever-growing numbers of ultra-runners are pushing their bodies to the limit, and, finally, to a climactic race in the Copper Canyons that pits America’s best ultra-runners against the tribe. McDougall’s incredible story will not only engage your mind but inspire your body when you realize that you, indeed all of us, were born to run."

I haven't finished it yet but I am 5 chapters in and loving it. Gripping stories that move beyond running and tell us something about ourselves.

How about you? Got any recommendations? What is your favorite running, athlete, adventure, life story book? Fire away.

Running Into a Vision of What Should Be

So I had a wonderfully bizarre experience yesterday. I joined my running group for our Sunday morning run. We ran for 17.9km (11 miles) in Lumpini Park. Some ran faster and some ran slower but we all made it. It wasn't until after the run that I had a chance to reflect and wanted to share a few thoughts with you.

I don't assume anyone who reads this blog is a Christian, but indulge me for a moment to make a comparison. Part of my journey is the connecting of faith. Even if you don't follow Jesus, it might help paint a picture anyways. In the same way I try to understand Buddhism, this might be a good way to start to understand what it means to follow Jesus.

It reminded me of what church should be. Not the building we tend to file into on Sunday's but what church was meant to be. Church was a word that represented a people, not a building. On our run, sure we had a goal. We wanted to go 7 laps around the park. We accomplished that goal, but what was amazing was how it got completed.

Two of us are pretty slow so we pull up the back of the pack and finished maybe as much as 30-40 minutes behind everyone. But for the first 5 laps, one of the fastest guys stayed back with us. He offered conversation, advice, thoughts and we just spent time getting to know each other. We felt bad for holding him up but he actually came back for us and wanted to do it. As others lapped us they would tell us good job and we would mutually encourage each other. As they lapped us, another guy hung back with us and we spent time with him and listened to his story and were inspired by his passionate life. Afterwards many of us stuck around and chatted and ate together (those who could hold down food).

Man, that is what this journey of faith is for me. It gave me a picture of what church should look like. People from all different nationalities and backgrounds with a common vision and journey heading in the same direction, sharing life and encouraging others to join us no matter who they are. Instead of looking out for ourselves we encouraged each other and even some sacrificed their ability to leave others in the dust for the sake of community. That's what this group is for me on Sunday mornings. It's church or how I would envision it.

(Sorry Bangkok Runners if this seems crazy. lol.)

Oh and Monday Morning Weigh In: Down to 114kg (250.8lbs)

Lost This Week: 0.8 kg, 1.8 lbs

Total loss: 5kg (11lbs)